roxanne--
oh my goodness, why does this have to be this way, shit never goes right. miranda and i were sittin here talking, and i must have drifted off, because all i could hear
and feel was someone pinching me and screaming roxanne roxanne.and i knew who it was because no one calls me roxanne but, miranda. sorry girl i was just thinking about
what my psycologist said about me being scared of success. ha. (here she go) well roxanne i have to agree with her, you are so smart and it seems like you get all the
way to the end and then turn around. o.k. ms. miranda lets talk about something else. fine, have you talked to farrah. yes girl and you know how she, now i think she
is the one who needs a psycologost, because i swear she has a sex addiction. (me and miranda busted out laughing then followed by a shot of tequila). where is my
phone, i am going to call her.(listening to "i like" by chico debarge while waiting for her to answer the phone, i like the way you comb your hair) oh hey farrah, what
up roxy, nothing me and miranda just sittin hear chillin and drinking, what you up to. well in farrahs sexy voice just left carlos because i needed my rent paid, ha ha
you know how i do. yes i do smh. well girl come over me and miranda are about to order chinese. after three and a half hours of eating, drinking, laughing and talking,
miranda and farrah are leaving. be carful guys and call me when you get home. walking into the kitchen and looking around all i could say was forget this i will clean
up in the morning even through tomorrow is saturday i have to get a lot of work done for work. i own an online magazine called "SAY WHAT". i am 29 years old my own
house, car, and buiness. yes i left out man. i accomplished everything i ever wanted, and i just feel like even though a man would make me happy, i just feel like it
is to much work and it is easier to be single. (wait wait wait, breakthrough let me write this down so i can remember and tell my psychologist). woo i have not been
this tried in a while. sittin on my bed thinking it's been over for 4 months now and i am truly over it, well almost but he keeps callin and callin. well as i laid
down in my queen size canopy bed with my satin sheets i think i was sleep before my head hit the pillow. six hours later, beep beep beep beep, ahhhhh o.k. o.k. trying
to open up my eyes to turn off this stupid alarm clock. as i laid there for another fifteen minutes, thinking about everything i have to do today. drifting off again,
what about a vacation me and the girls. omg.
o.k. back to reality, i will clean up first,and then give the girls a call to see if they want to do brunch. house clean, check hair done, check, shower, check and
it's only 11. i will call farrah first, (here we go again i like the way you) goodmorning sunshine, hi roxy rox. why are you up so early said farrah, girl it is 11 and
i was calling to see if you wanted to get some food. you know farrah of course i do, is miranda going. i'm about to call her now, and i will be at your house at 12:30
so be ready. k. it is a beatiful day out sun is shining just got my benz washed and waxed, now on my way to farrah's hood i mean house. haha. jumping on 90 west
bumping mary j. and p. diddy letting the wind mess up my hair, but who cares it feels so good. beep beep come on farrah we have to go. here comes farrah in here yellow
mini dress and her 6in stilettoes. hey farrah i hope you have a blunt rolled before miranda gets in the car you know how she is. who cares says farrah. i do come on
come on. twenty-three minutes later, as farrah and i were pulling in the driveway, ms. miranda (thats what i call her) was already on the porch. saying hello ladies as
miranda climbed into the back, took you guys long enough. whats so funny said miranda; you guys were smoking weren't you. no not us (giggles). well ladies what do you
guys have a taste for japanese, soul food. oh both of those sound good but since i have to choose wasabi it is. good thing they just opened we should sit right down.
10 minutes into lunch, i excuse myself to go to the restroom. trying to fight my way through the lobby to get to the rest room, their was brad standing there looking
very sexy. hi how are you? and brad responded with his sexy voice fine wit yo sexy ass. and of course i started blushing. (next question waiting waiting). so roxy why
haven't you returned any of my calls? well brad i have been really busy you know with the magazine and and you know. oh ok, well rox it was good to see you, i'll be
waiting on that returned phone call. o.k. brad bye. nearly running into the bathroom, i have never been so nervous in my life. whats wrong with me it's only brad.(get
it together, get it together). after ten minutes and finally returning to the table, all eyes are on me. and farrah with her loud ass," girl where you been did you
fall in". no, and hush. you will not believe who i just saw! who said miranda, and out of no where farrah said brad. how did you know, because farrah said there he is.
i wanted to hide under the table. he looked at me and smiled and kept walking.before they could say anything, i had to tell them; we will talk about it later. That was
the longest fifteen minutes of my life, the car ride to the mall that is. a before we go shopping nothing happen i said hi brad said why haven't i returned any of his
phone calls, and i made up a lame excuse. well why don't you return his calls asked miranda; with a puzzle look on her face? i don't know, feeling so confused inside.
i don't understand why you guys even broke up; maybe your psychologist was right not only are you afraid of success you scared of marriage. farrah how did you know
what my psychologist said, (in my attitude voice). miranda you have such a big mouth. roxanne i'm sorry but but, i don't know, but what i do know is that brad is a
good guy and he loves you. whatever lets go shopping. after a stressful day with the ladies, finally pulling in my driveway, just think about relaxing, taking a hot
bubble bath, and getting the biggest glass of wine. entering the kitchen getting my glass, wine, and laptop so i won't have to run all the way back downstairs. just
took my clothes of, runnung my water. soaking soaking getting out dripping wet. oh man i left my towel on the bed, let me grab my lavender victoria secerts. now what
it's eleven o clock not as tired as i thought. should i call him, i should but wait he wants to get married am i ready, no, yes why not. focus focus i have a lot of
work to do. i can't do this, so confused i want him but not the marriage is that bad, whats wrong with me. go to sleep roxy go to sleep.
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